Joshua Keith Edwards

Father's Day

2010-06-19T23:58:00.000-07:00

dad,

thank you.

thank you for loving me without question. thank you for being there for me, always. thank you for teaching me how to fix things. thank you for teaching me how to work on cars. thank you for teaching me how to finish well. thank you for teaching me how to treat a lady by the way you treat mom. thank you for disciplining me in love. thank you for never quitting. thank you for showing me how to be generous. thank you for having fun and laughing all the time! thank you for your passion. thank you for being you.

thank you.

love,
your son

thoughts to God

2010-06-11T22:34:00.000-07:00

Dear God,

Thank you for blessing me even when I mess up. You truly work for good. Thank you for using an imperfect person like me. Thank you for giving me a chance to impact your kingdom here on Earth.

Forgive me Lord: Forgive me for looking when my glance became a stare. Forgive me for staying silent when I should have defended you and your children. Forgive me for speaking when I should have been listening. Forgive me for not acting when I see injustice. Forgive me for not hiding more of your word in my heart. Forgive me for judging others when I should be loving.

James writes, “with the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring?” Lord help me to bless and encourage instead of judge and discourage. Help me to continue to strive for excellence. This world has such a low standard and excellence has been marginalized. I want to live better. I want to help others live better. The status quo can’t be what I’m longing for.

Lord, thank you for the opportunity to serve you this summer on summer staff. Thank you for stretching me and walking beside me as I journey through this summer. Thank you for blessing me with new friends and for bringing my friends back safely from last summer.

Lord I forget how awesome you are. Psalm 139 says, “Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there. If I make my bed in the depths, you are there.” Lord, thank you for being there when I rejoice and thank you for being there when I mourn. Lord I’m going to be real busy this summer… and I’ll be busy doing Kingdom things but help that not be an excuse for not spending time with you this summer.

Thank you for this year’s summer staff. Continue to bless us Lord as we follow you and show your love.

Amen.

haiti

2010-01-16T23:05:00.000-08:00

i've been reading articles and looking at pictures of the earthquake that hit haiti... its bad, its real bad... all i can do is pray for those people. i ask you to join me in for the people of haiti. words and pictures cannot describe the terrible devastation that's taking place over there.

thank you for your prayers. my heart goes out to all the people involved in this tragedy – those who have lost their lives, those who are still lost in the rumble, those who are alive but are now homeless, those who are looking for their lost family members... hmm... just pray.

i love and appreciate you.

new things...

2010-01-15T21:57:00.000-08:00

living up here at camp has made me have to reevaluate how i'm living.

i'm not surrounded by my closest friends from back home, i'm not surrounded by the church family i'm used to, i'm not within close driving distance of my parents and best friends, i'm not able to be involved in my local church the same way i was when i was back in carlsbad, ca. despite the new things i'm learning to live without... actually, i'm not living without the above mentioned things, i guess i'm living with them differently. for example, i now try/have to call my parents once or twice a week and say hi and catch them up on what's going on in my life... they are no longer 2 seconds away. and that's really different for me.

so my plan is to really pray about the things that i want to do differently (praying more is a good habit that i want to do more of this year). i've been kinda kickin' back these past few months and not really plugging myself into many things... mostly because i've made the excuse that i needed to find housing before i got involved with anything in the church... well guess what? i've been in a "house" for the past two weeks, so no more excuses. haha... i've started to regularly attend twin lakes church here in santa cruz and i'm really enjoying it. and what's better then going to a great church? going to a great church with the amazing girl that you're dating :) haha... no, but really its been great going to church with terra. its really helping us to keep the Lord at the center of our relationship. and i won't get started in about terra because that's a whole other blog post :) it'd take up too much space to write about her!

speaking of my housing... here is a picture of my sweet trailer!!

i know, i know... you're speechless. haha... well here's the story. i'm currently living in a trailer on a Christian camp ground. i'm going to be working at mount hermon this summer (in which housing is included) but i needed a place to live until then. although i'm currently working at mount hermon, i don't live on their property... i live at a camp called Daybreak which is a kid's summer camp. i'm working at that camp also doing lots of lawn maintenance/landscaping/general outdoor labor. i get to drive tractors and riding lawn mowers and use chainsaws and all other sorts of fun stuff!! i'm really enjoying my work at both campgrounds.

anyway... that's somewhat of an update of what's happening with me. i'm committed to blogging more too... honest :)

enjoy your day and smile at everyone you see today! people walk around discouraged all the time and maybe your smile can lift their spirits if only for a brief moment!! be light!!

the Lord provides but waiting is the hardest part...

2009-11-04T16:36:00.000-08:00

so i've been up here at mount hermon for about two and a half weeks and am still looking for some consistent hours here at the camp ground. i've been filling some cracks here and there and that's been paying the bills but it'll be nice to have a somewhat consistent schedule. i've also had a place to stay for free since i've been up here and that has been a huge blessing! although i'll have to find a place of my own in the next few weeks i'm so amazed at how the Lord has provided for me so far.

waiting is the hardest part... and its true. i haven't had a regular job for about a month and a half now. but somehow the Lord has provided me with everything that i've needed. there's a song by Urban Rescue called Simply Amazed and that's exactly what I am; simply amazed. the Lord has been blessing me in ways i wouldn't have been able to see if i wouldn't have surrendered to His plan and moved up here. God has placed my heart here and now i'm waiting for the opportunity to come. there have been times these last few weeks where i've been a little nervous about money and finances and have wondered when i'll get some steady hours... but i'm reminded that the Lord is my Jehovah-Jireh; my provider. Jeremiah 29:11 says,

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

what a promise! He knows the plans that He has for me! and they are not to harm me but to give me a hope and a future, what a blessing! too often i forget that God has a plan for me. i try to figure things out on my own. i try to make it work on my own and i end up getting burned. i'm experiencing the joy of trusting in the Lord. He has blessed me in so many ways these past few weeks with some part-time work to pay the bills, a place to stay, He's brought new people into my life and blessed my friendships so much...

so if i could give you any encouragement, any words of advice... i would say to simply trust and believe that the Lord really does have a plan for you/us. it doesn't matter how old you are, we are always trying to figure life out no matter what age/season of life that we're at. just remember to trust. keep reading your Bible too! that's something i think we could all use more of :)

stay encouraged my friends!!

life is good and God is good!

back at it...

2009-10-24T16:54:00.000-07:00

okay so i haven't posted to this blog since february of 2009... dang, that's a long time. i did post some stuff of this blog over the summer so feel free to check it out. as you can see from this picture i'm currently outside of the coffee shop here at camp where i come to to get free wireless internet!

i've been up here for a week now and i've really been enjoying my time so far. i've been catching up with friends, applying for jobs and just enjoying the natural beauty of my surroundings. i'm glad that i'm up here and hope to find a job soon, i've got some things in the works and i'll keep you posted for sure... right now i'm living with a couple of friends in a house near the camp ground.

but yeah, life is sweet right now. i've been reading Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller and really enjoying it. i'm about to start chapter 15 - he tells good stories and i like what he has to say. i know that some of my friends would probably not approve of Miller (or at least what they've heard of him) and although i don't agree with everything he says i do think he has some good things to say. but i think people are sometimes afraid to read or research things they disagree with, which is kinda dumb because then you just remain unknowing (another word would be ignorant but that word sounds harsh to a lot of people). anyway, i don't mean to write about this now, maybe later :)

i just wanted to to update you all a little bit and say that things are going well here at mount hermon!! some of you know my history of blogging and know its sporadic and that every now and then i get re-motivated to start again... haha, well this another one of those time of re-motivation. let's see how long it last! hopefully for a good while.

i love you all!

stay encouraged!

a valentine's day thought...

2009-02-14T23:17:00.000-08:00

so today is valentine's day, a holiday that i think was created by women and for women... haha.

anyways, today is usually about love. and i don't know how you view valentine's day but i really like that there is a day set aside for love. i really enjoy making people feel welcomed and accepted and loved. because the harsh reality is that many of us have been burned in the process of loving. whether in a romantic relationship or even with our families and friends... we've all experienced heartache of some kind. in my experiences in romantic relationships i've learned that a lot of what we're longing for and what we seek to get out of the relationship can stem from our selfish nature. meaning- we're in it for ourselves first and then think about the other person second. and that is completely the wrong order. we should first think about others and place their needs before our own and then take care of ourselves.

i've been guilty of being selfish in relationships, both romantic and with friends-- no doubt. and in the end i ended up breaking their heart. on the flip side, i've put others before myself and gotten burned bad. so i'm thinking, "gosh, i've hurt people and people have hurt me... what the heck!?" well whenever i'm seeking truth and clarity i turn to my bible, although sometimes its not my first option-- but what do you know... there's an entire chapter in 1 corinthians devoted to love and a super good chunk on scripture in philippians talking about selflessness.

when ever i think i'm being selfish i read philippians 2: 3-4 which says:

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others."

BOOM, that verse hits well and keeps me in my place. i understand that this life is not about me and that i was made to love and serve others. however, i am very human and i fight against my selfish self every day... its definitely a fight but i try to win it each day.

another passage that of scripture that i feel somewhat obligated to post of valentine's day is from 1 corinthians 13... the whole chapter is super good but let's read verses 1-7:

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

this is one of my favorite passages of scripture. its a passage that i've read countless times but have really come to understand it better in the last couple of years. its has helped define my life somewhat and has helped me set a standard for how i should be loving others. verse 4 speaks of a selfless love, a love that does not boast and that is not proud, it speaks of a love that is patient and a love that is kind... man... i want that love. i want to give that love. i want to give that love to everyone.

i hope you seek to love others in your life.

live love.

late night san francisco blogging...

2009-02-10T00:11:00.000-08:00

so i'm in san francisco on a working vacation... i'm playing music for a nazarene leadership conference. its been cool so far to be a part of this ministry opportunity. coming into this trip i was really excited because i knew i would be getting 4 days off of work and that was awesome because work has been really slow lately and a little boring. but when i got to this conference and started hearing people's stories i began to understand much more. i began to understand the history and legacies of the people whose presence i was in. the nazarene church is so rich and full of depth and history.

anyways, this will definitely be a randomly planned blog because i have more than one thing on my mind. we all went into the city tonight and it was awesome. i drove the golden gate bridge, it was pretty cool. here is a picture that i took while driving... yes, it was probably dangerous to drive and take a photo at the same time but you know me, i live life dangerously, haha...

but yeah the trip is going really well... we have one more full day left of the conference then we head back on wednesday.

so, i have been learning more about patience lately (and i'll talk about patience in a future blog). life has handed me a few different things in the past 2 or 3 months that have been challenges for me. mostly i've been thinking a lot about my future and what i'll do next in life... because to be honest my heart isn't settled where i'm at. for example, i'm thinking of moving out of carlsbad, i just kinda have an urge to move and experience life somewhere new! of course that's crazy for me to think of that, right? i mean i have a fulltime job with some benefits in a time of economic recession. but, the thing is i just really want to do something thats not for myself. i want to help and love others in a real tangible way. so many times i pray for others and i give money to good organizations who help people but i feel that i haven't done all that i can yet...

i've been so blessed in my life that i really fell the need to give back. a friend of mine was talking with me one day and she said that she "wants to see people the way that Jesus sees them... and love people the way that Jesus loves them"

that same friend is also a great poet and here is a stanza from a poem she wrote:

"Each day brings a newness
A chance to forget the day before
forget words spoken
thoughts thought
So take this day present now
Hold onto that moment of good
Let go of all else"

even though is just one verse in the poem, it really stood out to me. i really like these words because it encourages me to keep on moving forward. too often i've found myself looking on the past with a troubled heart. sure i've made some wrong decisions, had bad days and even shaken my fist at God in anger and frustration... but today is a new day, today is a brand new day!! i'm so glad for the ability to forget the ill words i've spoken in the past and to forget the thoughts that i've thought in the past, i love the visual i get of the last two lines on the verse in that poem that say, "hold onto that moment of good, let go of all else" thats what i want to do... i want to hold on to the good things that i can experience every day and to let go of the things that are hindering me, and i want to encourage you to do the same...

are there things in your life that are hindering you from experiencing true joy? are you holding on to the ill words you've spoken to others in the past? are you holding on to the ill words that others have spoken towards you in the past? are you holding on to past experiences that seem to be holding you back from moving on? if you've answered yes to any of those questions, i understand, i've been there. but you can move on... Philippians 3:12-14 says, "12Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

Be encouraged...

live love.

scripture for today

2009-02-02T23:34:00.000-08:00

Romans 12:2

Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

I like the Message tranlation of this verse, its a little longer but hits a little different:

So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.

So often it seems like we only rely on God when we need him. This scripture encourages us to give everything to God. I really like when it says, Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. It seems like we're so busy trying to live life here on earth that we sometimes forget to fix our attention on something greater than ourselves.

I hope you're encouraged by this passage of scripture. Don't you want to be free and for God to bring out the best in you? I know I do... I love you all!!

live love.

25 random facts...

2009-02-01T00:10:00.000-08:00

here is something i posted on facebook, its a little thing going around where you write out 25 random facts about yourself, then you tag people in your note so they can read about you, so i decided why not post it here too... enjoy

i wasn't planning on doing this whole '25 random facts' but i do believe in playing by the rules. and since my sister and a few friends tagged me in their notes i figured it'd be fair to do the same... so here you are my wonderful friends... 25 random facts about Joshua Keith Edwards :)

1. I'm probably the most picky/plain eater you'll ever meet. But I've been expanding my taste palette... little by little.

2. I think I over use ellipses... when I type... emails... and facebook comments... I think... its because... I don't know... a lot about punctuation...

3. I have had two knees surgeries and as a result have synthetic ligaments in both knees.

4. I am very stubborn... but it's a silent stubborn.

5. I reread all my facebook comments, emails, messages and texts once or twice to make sure it makes sense grammatically. Although, I still can't catch everything...

6. I absolutely love classic trucks and cars. I have a 1954 Chevy pickup truck that I restored from the ground up. It's my baby and I love it! On that subject, I want to restore a classic car for my wife (A. if I get married. B. if she's into that).

7. Between Monday and Friday I drive to the beach after work and watch the sunset at least 4 times a week.

8. I drive the speed limit and that can be annoying to some people, haha.

9. I see the very best in people and believe in others without question.

10. I don't play video games. Never got into it. I'd prefer to play music, work on a car or just do something outside.

11. My family means the world to me but I don't tell them enough...

12. When I was 7 I had a poster of a NBA player named Kevin Edwards (who was black)... My loving sister, who is 4 years older then I am, convinced me he was my cousin. Both our last names were Edwards so she had to be right, right? Later that evening I asked my dad, "Why didn't you tell me my cousin was in the NBA?" Come to find out, he wasn't my cousin at all... stupid sissy tricking me... haha, I love you Alicia!!!!!!!

13. I like my brother in-law. He super talented at the guitar, helps me with my taxes and more importantly he takes real good care of my sister... if he didn't I'd break his knee caps :) haha, love you Jer

13. I like country music, but I'm picky...

14. I secretly want to quit my job and move somewhere new and have an adventure (ignore this if you are my boss and are reading this)

15. I was born in Houston, Texas and lived there till I was 8 and 1/2 years old. I always assume I would have ridden bulls on the PBR tour.

16. I am very patriotic and extremely grateful and proud of all the men/women who serve(d) in all branches of our Military. I get so upset with people in our country who trash talk the defenders of our freedom. I also think its a shame that our Marines get compensated so poorly. (sorry, I guess another random fact is that I'm pretty opinionated when it comes to certain things) moving on...

17. I listen to the lyrics in songs and that dictates about 80% of the music I listen to. I love music with meaning.

18. I think girls who drive pickup trucks are automatically cooler/cuter.

19. I just realized there are two number thirteens... whoops

20. I tend to march to the beat of my own drum and that leaves me standing alone sometimes.

21. One time, while kissing a girl... she burped in my mouth. It was disgusting but hilarious.

22. I'm not really a movie person.

23. In college I drove a 1987 Toyota Corolla with spinner hubcaps...

24. The sound of people chewing their food with their mouths open absolutely disgusts me.

25. I firmly believe that there will never be peace in our land until there is peace in the hearts of men/women. Until we settle the war that rages in our hearts we will never be able to settle the war that rages outside of it.

so there you have it, 25 random things. I hope you've enjoyed reading...

live love.

time with God... on purpose?

2009-01-31T00:00:00.000-08:00

basically, i've really been trying to spend time with God on purpose. sounds funny, huh? like, duh josh, as a Christian wouldn't you want to do that anyways... well, yes but the truth is that in the past i've rarely set aside time during the day to spend with the Lord.

so here's just some thoughts i've been having... as time goes on i'll learn how to have coherent thoughts and blogs but right now they're most likely going to be sporadic and will/won't be expanded upon... haha.

like, why do we have to pretend to be so strong to others. why can't we show our hurt... why don't we get on our knees and pray to God in absolute surrender? are you that prideful? are you that independent? am i that prideful? am i that independent? a lot of times, yes. but i don't want to be afraid to love people with everything i have. its like i love others but only to a certain extent. but i want to let my guard down and be real with people. i'm real about 99% of the time, but when people get too close to me i tend to not let them in. i'm afraid so i run and keep a safe distance. because isn't life easier to live when you know you're safe? i would say yes.

i'm still enjoying the poem i posted a few posts ago titled, "disturb us, Lord"... that's what has been happening in my life lately, the Lord has been disturbing my safe world that i've created for myself. and i've been changing, little by little... let me tell you that trying to crack years of independence, pride, stubbornness and my superb ability to build walls around my heart is not easy at all. but can be done... i'm learning that obedience to God is very important. being obedient in the things that i say, do, think, act upon... it all matters. I like this passage in 1 Peter 3:8-11 that says,

"Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For, Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech. He must turn from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it."

i'll end with a cool quote i found the other day, no author was listed so i'm not sure who said it though:

"The highest courage is to dare to be yourself in the face of adversity. Choosing right over wrong, ethics over convenience, and truth over popularity... these are the choices that measure your life. Travel the path of integrity without looking back; for there is never a wrong time to do the right thing."

live love.

sunsets and chevy's

2009-01-29T22:50:00.000-08:00

my truck at sunset… one of my favorite things to do is drive along the coast in my truck and stare at the ocean (although I should be looking at the road)

sunset afterglow

2009-01-19T19:35:00.000-08:00

this a picture is from tonight's sunset afterglow where I live in carlsbad, california. the afterglow is what happens after the sun goes down, believe it or not– sometimes the afterglow is more beautiful than the actual sunset.

disturb us, Lord

2009-01-18T22:48:00.000-08:00

Here is a quote that I found on my cousin's Facebook page. When I read it I was humbled and inspired. Here it is:

------------------------------------------------

Disturb us, Lord, when We are too well pleased with ourselves,
When our dreams have come true
Because we have dreamed too little,
When we arrived safely
Because we sailed too close to the shore.

Disturb us, Lord, when
With the abundance of things we possess
We have lost our thirst
For the waters of life;
Having fallen in love with life,
We have ceased to dream of eternity
And in our efforts to build a new earth,
We have allowed our vision
Of the new Heaven to dim.

Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly,
To venture on wider seas
Where storms will show your mastery;
Where losing sight of land,
We shall find the stars.
We ask You to push back
The horizons of our hopes;
And to push into the future
In strength, courage, hope, and love.

-Sir Francis Drake

------------------------------------------------

After reading this I felt like I had been 'put in my place' somewhat. Because often I don't sail very far from the shore, I like to see land and know that I'm in safe distance to the shore. But in the past few months I've been really thinking about sailing out of sight of the land... so far out that I would actually have to put my faith in God. You see, when I sail close to the shore I think its because I like to be the one setting the course, I choose to guide myself instead of letting God guide me. Selfish you say? Absolutely, that one of the things that I struggle with the most.

I'm 24 years old, strong, capable, stubborn and very independent. Those aren't quite the ingredients for easy surrender. Giving up control is tough and I battle it everyday without fail. I'm learning how to truly 'give up' my life and learning how to trust in God better. But its something worth fighting for because I long to sail out of sight of land, I long to be used for the glory of the Lord and not for the glory of myself.

live love.

back in action...

2008-12-22T21:47:00.000-08:00

good evening friends. i'd like to take this time to update you. i've decided to start finally bogging regularly again... even though i already said i was going to do it more regularly back in october... and that post was even titled slacker, haha, for sure...

again... i'm more of a pen and paper type journaler. i like to draw all over my journal as i write and scribble words really big for emphasis. but here i am now typing away on my laptop. we'll see how this goes i suppose. from here on out i'll probably be sharing different stories with you about my life and stories from other people's lives. i'll also be sharing poetry, art, photography and other things that inspire me. whether its to challenge or to encourage will be for your interpretation. but basically i just want to share with you, my friends...

if you want to get a hold of me, you can find me on facebook or virb

live love.

slacker... haha

2008-10-19T21:44:00.000-07:00

so apparently i'm not good with this blogging stuff. i haven't posted since middle of summer... my problem is that i have a paper journal so when and what am i supposed to write here? whatever, i'm gonna try to post more to this blog. especially since there's so much happening in my life... so stay tuned and check back often because there will be more posts... and even video blogs coming soon... woohoo!!!

peace and thanksgiving.

time for a change

2008-07-18T00:12:00.001-07:00

well i've been thinking about a lot of things lately, mostly spiritual things. such as: how much am i into my faith? how am i involved in my local church body? how am i involved in my community? am i living my life in a way that's in line with the teachings of Jesus from the Bible? am i living my life how i should be or am i living my life how i want others to see it?

and then i have also been thinking about other stuff like: who and what am i surrounding myself with? am i devoting time to my friends? how much do i care about those who have less than i do? what am i doing to help those less fortunate?

i won't answer all these questions because that would be a super long blog but i will touch on a some. i want to start with the spiritual things. there is no denying the fact that i am a Christian. but i think even saying that i'm a Christian leaves a bad taste in some people's mouths. there tends to be a common bias against most Christians by non-Christians as being hypocrites or "Sunday Christians". and its partly the fault of people who claim the title Christian and just run it into the ground. God has called us to lead a life set apart from the world and its ways. yeah, being a faithful Christian is a tough path to follow but its something that i want to strive for. i mean i would rather spend my whole life trying to live better and be a better person and it not be true, than destroy my self and be wrong.

some Christians wonder if others can see Christ in their lives, and that's a valid question. but sometimes we get hung up on what others are thinking of us instead of living our lives how we should be. what i mean is that you shouldn't be living your life hoping that others will see what a good Christian you are. you should live your life according to the teachings of Christ for yourself and if others notice, cool. its not about impressing non-believers or "wowing" them.

personally, i'm not happy with the way i've been living. i've come to do some things out of monotony and because its "just what i do". i never want to go to church out of habit and i never want to live my life so that others can see how good of a person i am. i want to go to church to be a part of the community of believers and to worship through song and through the teaching of the Word. i want to live a life according to the teachings of the Bible for myself. and i don't want to live for myself, i'm called to be a servant and to follow Christ's example. i want to surround myself with people who think like i do so we can make a difference in this war-torn world. there are so many hurting people and i long to help make a difference.

and so i'm going to start living that way, and if my Christian friends think i'm too radical or taking too much of a stand for Christ, then tough. i can't be held back and let others get in the way of how i want to live my life. and in most cases, i've been held back by myself and thoughts of my past. but you know what? i'm over it. i'm done dwelling on the past, i'm moving forward. a scripture to back this up is found in Philippians 3: 12-14

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

this is a video from rob bell talking about letting go of the past and moving on...

some of my friends who read this post will think, "gosh josh, where did this come from?" well basically i'm just tired of kind of living for Christ. i know that if no one does anything, then nothing will get done. change doesn't happen just because we hope for it. change comes through action, and i'm ready to take action.

if we say we believe, then let's live like we believe.

my cousin

2008-06-27T09:06:00.001-07:00

well i mentioned my cousin going to rehab in my first post and wanted to update. his name is christopher and he completed his 3 day treatment in arizona and was accepted to a 6 month treatment facility in long beach, california. my prayer is that he would stick with it because its up to him whether he stays in the full 6 months or not. he started his 6 months last monday and for the first 30 days he can't have contact with anyone from his life, like friends and family. thats going to be hard for his mom but we're all praying for him. chris use to walk with the Lord and be active in his youth group but he doesn't really believe much now or at least he's unwilling to accept it.

if you're the praying type i would ask that you send up a prayer for my cousin chris. a period of alcohol and drugs has really messed up his mental capacities and my prayer is for healing and stability. i appreciate you reading this and praying!! many thanks.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Philippians 4:6

lust? the silent killer... a post for men.

2008-06-26T23:16:00.000-07:00

the topic of lust is a huge bite to chew on for some. so here are some of my thoughts and opinions on the matter. i'm writing on this subject because i feel it is often "swept under the rug" and rarely mentioned. in this morally declining culture its super important to become a person who is grounded in truth, whether you're a guy or girl. however, i can only speak from a male perspective for obvious reasons.

its summer time and as a 24 year old man living in sunny southern california i'm surrounded by beauty in more ways than one. i love the beautiful ocean, trees, landscapes and natural surroundings. there is also another "beauty" here, women. haha... and guys have a way of being particularly visual specimens. plainly put, we are turned on by provocative images. and if we're not careful we let our minds sail into some dangerous waters. i know lust is a struggle in some way for every guy, whether it be impure thoughts, experimenting sexually with girls, pornography...etc. and if you say its not a struggle then you're just lying to yourself. lust can be a mental battle for a lot of guys... the way we think, what we think about and how viewing certain images skews our interpretation of beauty.

as a man i'm not saying you should shun yourself from women, not at all. i believe women are one of the most precious things this world has to offer. however, i think that the way we as men appreciate women must change.

the bible is super clear when it comes to how we as men should live, think and treat women. on the issue of how we should live Ephesians 5:3-4 says, "But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity... because these are improper for God's holy people. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving..." isn't that intense? it says not even a hint of sexual immorality. for a man in today's culture, that's a hard word to follow. and it goes on to say no course joking!? wow, is it possible to actually live up to those standards? i think we can make a valiant effort to do so.

some guys would blame women for dressing too sexy and therefore making them "stumble". i agree to a certain extent, we as men however need to show the utmost respect for women and stop staring at them like some object. its hard though because mainstream media and culture tell us to objectify women. in today's culture we are surrounded by sex; in advertisements, on television, on billboards and all kinds of printed and online material. we can't fall into the lies they're feeding us. if we do, we're gaining a false interpretation of love and of true beauty. and in return our attempts at relationships in our personal lives will fail because we're trying to attain that "perfect" love and beauty fed to us my the media. its kinda sad...

i don't know, i'm sure i'll have more to write on this topic someday later but i just wanted to start to write about it. i hope you can be encouraged to challenge the norm and live a healthy life. and know that you don't have to accept the world's view of beauty and love. you can accept the real beauty of getting to know a girl inside and out and experience love far beyond what the world portrays.

my prayer for us as men is that we would want to live right. and that we would keep our minds pure and our deeds clean. because there is a lot of temptation in the world and we need to start holding our brothers in Christ accountable to this silent killer. my prayers and thoughts are with all of you who read this blog. if you want to talk more about this issue feel free to email me at alwayslivelove@gmail.com

continue to challenge normalcy.

father's day

2008-06-15T21:52:00.000-07:00

well today is father's day and i'm blessed to have a dad. and i mean it, because not everyone has a dad. many of my friends grew up only having a mom. i always wonder how single moms feel about father's day because in a way they're a father too. i have so much respect for single moms because they do it all and still manage to make it. but back to my dad, i have been blessed with a great dad. and although when i was growing up i fought him on a lot of stuff, i now appreciate what he taught me. he taught me what it means to really be a man.

starting to blog.

2008-06-13T01:07:00.000-07:00

well, i've decided to start blogging. not for any specific reason other an outlet for my brain.

i actually just found out today that one of my cousins is mentally breaking down, which makes me sad. a period of alcohol and drugs in his life has truly taken a toll on his mind. he's currently in detox for the next three days. he isn't currently using but his mind is just not functioning properly. but he's surrounding my family out in arizona so he's got a good support system and i know he's in good hands because he's in God's hands.

i've a lot of stuff i've been thinking about lately and it'll all come out eventually but its late so i'm going to bed.

but before i go i just want to say that i have no idea who will be reading this blog but i want you to know that i care about you. i'm a Christian and want everyone to know the God that i serve. my faith, simply put, is that i love God and i love others. i believe we can change the world through love and that it starts in our hearts. i have seen the way he works in my life and in the lives of those around me. my prayer for you is that you would be encouraged. if you're already a follower of the way, i encourage you to really start living what you say you believe. and if you're reading this and you're not a Christian i want you to know that there is a God who loves you and cares about you and wants you to live free!

live love.